LIFE & DIVORCE COACHING
Sometimes the hardest thing to do when you are going through difficult times, is to ask for help. However, these are precisely the times when reaching out for support are most important. Every human being experiences time of great joy and ease, as well as difficultly and struggle. It's part of the ebb and flow of life. The key is knowing how to build yourself up, create support systems and persevere in a healthy, empowering manner during the hard times. Next time you are tempted to self-isolate or dig your heals in with the belief that you "don't need any help", think again. Asking for help brings up a whole slew of emotions - fear of being judged, rejected or a burden, looking foolish, or being needy. I would like to suggest that in spite of our sometimes overriding beliefs that would otherwise keep us from reaching out for assistance, asking for help can actually prove quite valuable to your current problem and to your overall self-esteem.
1. New Perspective/New Possibilities
I'm sure you've heard the expression, "no man is an island." If you look around, great things in our world came as the result of great minds working together. This is no less true when it comes to our emotional well-being. When we are feeling burdened with stress, difficult decisions or difficult transitions, it is not uncommon to believe that the only one who can "fix" your situation is you. Unfortunately, when we are under stress, in fear, or overwhelm, our creative juices are not at their best and solutions do not always flow. Reaching out to others builds connections by allowing others to share their information and resources. It allows for the possibility of fresh ideas, perhaps a new perspective and a sense of relief that your situation is not as dismal or impossible as it might otherwise feel.
2. Being Vulnerable Fosters Connection to Others
Did you know that being vulnerable allows us to connect with others, which is hugely important to optimal wellbeing? Sounds rather paradoxical as the common knee-jerk reaction while going through a difficult time may be to close up in an effort to be self protective. Ironically, the act of being vulnerable and exposed helps us build trust with ourselves and with others, which is an important bridge to press on and persevere. It also increases your ability to have empathy for others which enables social connections. Connectedness to other human beings is vital for wellness.
3. Improves Resilience
Facing adversity is part and parcel of being human. Facing any challenge with help from others can exponentially increase the ease of successfully transitioning through. Asking for help from family, friends, dedicated professionals and support groups can create optimism and hope when facing challenging situations. This support allows you to obtain feedback, take more risk while dealing with uncertainty and overcome setbacks and grow, thereby improving your resilience.
4. Shows Great Strength
All too often, asking for help is perceived as a sign of weakness. On the contrary, reaching out for assistance is a sign of strength and a way to elicit collaboration. Allowing yourself to show your vulnerability and admit that you may not have all the answers is often perceived by others as quite admirable and a sign that you are resourceful and confident. There is something very human about reaching out to others that shows you are willing to put your ego and fear to the side, in order to invite someone else into the fold of your challenges. Ponder the alternative of not asking for help when you need it - you not only assume one hundred percent of a burden which could otherwise be shared, but you also deprive others the opportunity to provide support and caring for you, making it a win-win!
Oftentimes, our greatest wins are when we collaborate with others!
Love & Light,