If you know the feeling of OVERWHELM during divorce, you are probably wondering - is there an end in sight??
I know how it feels - getting hit from every direction during divorce - especially in the early stages. Financial Concerns The beginning stages bring with it the first wave of financial concerns - lawyer retainers, net worth statements, temporary support and the uncertainty of how much money you will receive or have to pay long-term and the impact on your day to day living. Residential Issues Living and housing considerations include the stress of one person moving out (another expense and unnerving experience) or both residing together until the divorce is final (which can be a nightmare in itself). Visitation Then there's the issue of the children and creating new and often challenging (and stressful for all) visitation schedules. Plethora of Long-Term Uncertainties Long-term concerns include the division of assets, breaking up joint household arrangements like insurance (car, health, homeowners, and life) dividing belongings, taxes, selling of a marital home (if applicable), credit and new loan issues, getting back into the workplace, new schedules and responsibilities as a single person, how to deal with family events, holidays and celebrations, adjusting to single parenthood and co-parenting. All this while trying to do the day to day life responsibilities and go to work. Emotional Upheaval And lest we forget the title wave of emotional upheaval that comes with breaking up a marriage and family - sadness, anger, fear, anxiety, guilt, loss of identity, feeling displaced, exhaustion, etc etc. WHEW! I'm exhausted just writing this! The Problem - Going It Alone Most people have the misguided idea that they have to bear the burden of all of this alone. This takes an already daunting situation and magnifies it further. The result is feeling consistently stressed, an inability to relax, which can lead to lack of sleep, unhealthy eating (either over or under eating) a state of mind that is NOT well suited for thinking clearly and making the best decisions for yourself and your future. Oftentimes, this leads to being so overloaded that you just feel stuck. The Solution - Getting Support The solution is really quite simple - Get Support! Having the support of friends and family who make you feel good and are there to lend an ear or lend a hand to ease the overwhelm of your new lifestyle and the legal process is vital. Professional support, such as a therapist or coach will provide much needed help in shouldering the burden so you can take one step at a time. The result will be clearer thinking and workable action plans to manage the whole enchilada. This is a great antidote for relieving stress, overwhelm and feeling stuck, and allowing you to see some light at the end of the tunnel. In this way, it becomes easier to move forward empowered, and implement a well-thought out methodical and manageable plan for each issue of concern. I’ve witnessed the transformation that occurs when objectivity and support is present to get through divorce, making it easier to breath and attack each issue with clarity for self-serving results. Be kind to yourself and get support in managing all of the elements thrown at you throughout the divorce process. You should not shoulder this overwhelming experience alone. Schedule a Strategy Call today. - Elisa
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ELISA
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Elisa Valentino
HOLISTIC BEHAVIORAL PRACTITIONER DIVORCE & LIFE TRANSITION COACH SPIRITUAL LIGHTWORKER PUBLIC SPEAKER PODCAST HOST |